It’s OK this isn’t a political post really, although I would like to say thank you to our local Labour candidate who nearly ran me off the road on Thursday when he was concentrating more on his loundspeaker thing than his driving!
This is about a different kind of party politics – birthday parties….
Earlier this week Miss Frugal told me about a party one of her friends was having that she hadn’t been invited to. She wasn’t too bothered herself but as the birthday girl had been one of the girls invited to Miss Frugal’s pamper party last September, I couldn’t help but wonder why she hadn’t been invited. We had a quick chat about how everyone couldn’t be invited to everyone’s party and she seemed to forgot about it but me, being the worrier that I am, worried that they’d fallen out or that there was some other reason why she hadn’t been invited.
It must have bothered Miss Frugal more than she’d let on as well because the next day she came home from school and said that she’d asked the birthday girl why she hadn’t been invited (she’s not backwards in coming forwards) and was pleased that the the little girl had told her that she hadn’t actually chosen the guests herself – it was her mam. Rather than sending out invitations, she just texted or Facebooked the parents with the details and only the children of the parents in her little school gate clique were invited. So now I’m worried about why I’m not popular enough to be in the cliquey group or why I’m not receiving lots of Facebook friend requests from the other mums (only joking, I’m not really worrying about that- should I be? ;-))
In all seriousness though, I always thought there was a kind of birthday party etiquette, if your child was invited to someones party, you would make sure that you invited them to your childs. That’s what I’ve always done as it seems like the ‘right thing’ to do. I even write the names of the children whose parties we’ve been to on my calendar so I don’t miss anyone out!
And while I’m whingeing on about birthday party etiquette, why do people think it’s acceptable to let you know on the morning of the party that their child will be coming to your party or to not let you know at all and then just turn up!
So now that I’ve got that off my chest, I’ll be off to tidy the house as it looks like a disaster after Miss Frugal’s sleepover last night…. I could be gone a while!
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I never thought about it like that – it's not like we owe them anything as we bought the child a nice present for their party….
Sam's dad is very into the party scene – he has organised Sam's parties for the last 5 years. I can't stand them! The best one we ever had was when we had a cake open house party. I made 5 different kinds of cake, let everyone know you could drop into the house at any point during the day and that he didn't need presents, but if you wanted to bring something you could bring more cake, and the recipe for it. 2 packets of paper plates and a bin bag later, and we were done!
And as for the school gate clique thing…. you try being the teacher! You walk out with the class and all these huddles of parents look at you like you've got three heads!
Thats sounds like a fantastic idea for a party – I might steal that one myself ;-D
I won't be doing these kiddie birthday parties either. Im all for sleepovers and what not but all this birthday party stuff gives me nerves lol. I won't mind my daughter going to parties but i'd prefer to do something special that my daughter chooses, perhaps with a best friend. But what do i know, not quite at that stage yet!
I wish I'd started out like that but now that we've started parties it's hard to stop!
This is a nightmare and I steered well clear of having any parties at all, one child's birthday was in the summer hols and one in the christmas hols and we used to stick to family only and a 'special' dinner, with a cake and a few presents, my kids went to a few parties but when we started getting 'gift lists' oh yeah! like weddings, I banned the kids from going, the whole idea is troublesome and more and more parents are living vicariously through their children and to be honest, I've never felt comfortable with that
A gift list!!! How ridiculous is that?
hhhmmmmm I have views about this… you ready? 😉
1. it should be up to the child who comes to THEIR birthday party, not parents' friend's children.
2. you shouldn't feel obliged to invite back – parties could get out of control like that.
3. whatever happened to the child writing out invitations and sending them out?
4. RSVP-ing to what ever type of invitation you have sent out should be a given. It really riled me when people used to just turn up. I've also had a few ask if so-and-so's brother/sister can come "so they don't feel left out".
And, Cass, of COURSE you should be worried about which cliqué you're in at the school gate. How on EARTH will you ever measure your popularity if you don't???
*ahem*
I've had people ask if brothers / sisters can come too which is fine if its at our house but not when I have to pay per head!
Thanks for putting me straight about the school gate clique lol